Kina, Families & Addiction Trust

Lost for words mum

Posted on 5 December 2016 | 3 Comments

I have a 33yr old daughter who seems to have lost her way and has turned to a life of drugs. The sad part is there is a little boy involved who both my husband and I worry about. We tread lightly as it will be the little one that will wear the force of it. We have this little one for 4 nights of every week which spans over the weekend and 1 day both sides of the weekend.


My daughter comes and stays most weeks with us and tries to get herself sorted out but still goes back to her ways. She is so down and out it is not funny. When she comes down she gets moody and violent to herself and harms herself badly. She has bald patches on her head through pulling out her hair. We are not immune to the horrific backlash of the drugs and their effects. There is just so much that goes on with families and loved ones that turn to drugs- it is just exhausting.


My main concern right now is for my grandson who has seen so much in his little life time and does not want to go with his mum. There is a dad in this picture and although he’s not as bad, does not help the situation. While my grandson would rather go with his dad, his dad likes to partake in the drugs as well but doesn't seem to effect him as much.


My daughter does synthetics.


  • Hi 'lost for words'. Your love and care for your grandson is the greatest gift to him and your daughter. If you want some help to decide what the best thing to do is, there are several places to start. You can contact CYFS anonymously through their 0800 number listed on their website and talk over the situation with the duty social worker. If you live in Auckland you can contact CADS 09 845 1818, and get free counselling for yourself and your husband to help you look after yourselves and to sort out what you may want to do about the situation. If you live outside of Auckland the alcohol & drug helpline has been useful to people in your situation 0800 787 797. As you may guess from my post I work in this area, particularly with family members. You are not alone and getting support from others makes a positive difference.

    Posted by Michelle Brewerton, 12/12/2016 9:33am (5 years ago)

  • identify with your story . don't ever give up
    regards Rosemary

    Posted by Rosemary, 07/12/2016 10:49am (5 years ago)

  • I can only mother too mother offer you hope . My 35 year old son is finally off drugs and alcohol ,And crime ,he started when he was 14 . All those years really took a toll on me and my life. I was so lost and constantly waited for the phone to ring or the police to arrive at my doorstep. It was one drama to another and it never stopped . But after I put up strong boundaries and stopped it effecting me and my husband ,he finally realized that I had said NO. Just for today I send my love to you . The biggest thing in your dilemma is too keep the baby safe ...Take care of yourself . my hope is that your daughter will get well. it just takes time.

    Posted by Rosemary, 05/12/2016 10:06pm (5 years ago)

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